On trial

 So, Andi has been on trial for just over a week now, and apparently it is going okay. It's funny, but just like everything else about this boy, this is not worrying me. 

He's going to be fine. 

If I get worried about it, I realize I am channeling "Sherwood's Mom", and just remind myself that he is not The Ruiner, but Unicorn Babybutt. And therefore, everything is fine. No one has died without my constant supervision, and I will not owe them money for damages to their barn. 

I have had a bit of a.. conniption that Shelby had to talk me through, which is again, a hangup from owning my loverly mare. (She really has me well trained, don't you think?) And that is... Am I selling him short? Did I turn away those UL dressage riders too quickly? Am I taking a professionally trained, recognized event horse and selling him to a very backyard barn?? And again, I just needed  someone who knows me better than most, and who understands how.. quirky I am, to remind me that, No. I have quite literally done the absolute best I could for this boy. He does not want to be a show horse, he wants to be loved and kissed and fed. He could care less about ribbons or accolade, he just wants someone to rub his blaze and tell him he's the sweetest bestest boy ever. 

Thank you Shelby, once again, for talking me down from my ledge. 

And don't think me a snob. I mean, I am NOW, so maybe you should. Bahaha! But... I grew up in barns where fencing fell down, barns were dirt-floored, and people did not wear Dubarrys to muck stalls. Hell, they definitely did not even have a pair of them lying around. I grew up on horses who weren't allowed at other barns until everyone had cleared out for the night because they were so.. dangerous. Let's just say it, Dan was dangerous. And that will be a story for another time. But they were fed, they were turned out daily, they all had blankets as needed in the snow, and their feet were done mostly on time. The humans suffered- ate Ramen, lived in 50 degree cabins, had credit issues- so the ponies didn't. And.. I learned what I did NOT want to be like as an adult. 

Honestly, I may be inconsistent, but I'm a good horseperson. And I got lessons, found trainers, pursued higher levels of knowledge as an adult- and you know what? I've been called ballsy and brave and crazy and stubborn, but the fact is, I learned how to RIDE at backyard barns. I learned stickability- both in the saddle and out- you stick with what you have and learn to make it work. And in this age of disposability, I guess I could have learned worse lessons. So, if Sammi learns half of that on Andi, then things could be worse, right?